In this sermon, I reveal the root of most addiction and give you the steps to overcome sex, porn, and masturbation addiction.
6 But He gives us more grace. This is why it says: “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” 7 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you. 8 Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. (James 4:6-8)
How to know if you’re addicted
- You can only go for short periods of time (days or a few weeks) before returning to the same behavior. You say you need to stop, but end up breaking your promise.
- You feel anxious or uncomfortable if you cannot do it. “The higher the level of panic and pain you anticipate, the stronger the hold it has on you” (source).
- Your behavior is disrupting your relationships, work, and life goals.
Note to yourself: Stop feeling guilt and shame for having sexual desire. Sexual desire is normal, but you will not be ruled and lead into sin by it.
Confess and repent
However, you should be ashamed for your excessive behavior and your violation of the will of God when he says to “flee fornication” and adultery (1 Corinthians 6:18, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11). Therefore, before you do anything, you should have confessed your sin and repented.
10 Steps to overcome porn and sex addiction
The first thing to know is that addictions are often to due to demonic influence. When people practice sin for too long, unclean spirits can come to live in their bodies to experience the sins they enjoy. This is evident when you truly want to stop, but something inside you compels you to continue. It feels like it’s not you anymore because it isn’t—it’s a demon.
Here are the steps to take:
- Take your authority in Christ and cast out any spirits (Luke 10:19). Submit to god, resist the devil and he will flee (James 4:6-8).
- Cut off all sensual media: TV, movies, blogs, dating apps, etc. No sex, erotic talk, kissing, revealing clothing should be found in the media you consume.
- Avoid places where you’ll be exposed to sexy people for long periods of time. Examples: clubs, hookup spots, the mall, college campus, and the beach. If at your workplace, change the position of your desk to face elsewhere.
- Stop dressing sexy to get attention—this goes for men and women.
- Dis-fellowship people. Don’t hang with fornicators and adulterers because their spirits will bother you. Cut off all communication with your sex partners. No meetup, phone calls, or texting (1 Corinthians 5:11, 15:33).
- Flee the scene. If a sensual scene in a movie presents itself, fast forward, look away, or get up and leave to avoid viewing the stimuli. If you’re alone with someone who wants to have sex, flee the scene like Joseph did with the Potipher wife (Genesis 39:6-23).
- Change your focus. In the presence of sexy people, focus on their foreheads and nothing else (Job 31:1-10).
- Be proactive. For people overcoming masturbation and porn addiction: If you get aroused, jog or do some push-ups. For people overcoming fornication and adultery: masturbate if necessary to relieve yourself, but don’t become addicted to masturbation or porn. Develop a plan to prevent yourself from falling when the change presents itself.
- Humble yourself with fasting (Psalm 35:13). Jesus said, some unclean spirits don’t come out without prayer and fasting. Prayer and fasting is a way weaken your flesh and strengthen your spirit.
- Find your purpose and focus on building that. This will occupy your time and give a ton of fulfillment. You will have very little time to masturbate, view porn, and chase people.
Verses mentioned in this sermon:
- Some demons don’t come out but by prayer and fasting (Matthew 17:19-21)
- You’ve been given power over unclean spirits (Luke 10:19)
- There is no condemnation for those in Christ (Romans 8:1-2)
- Walk in the spirit, not in the flesh (Galatians 5:16-25)
- Humble your soul with fasting (Psalm 35:13)
- Satan stopped tempting Jesus only to return later (Luke 4:13)
- The account of Joseph and Potiphar’s wife (Genesis 39:6-23)